Things I learned during Week 1 of Chemo:
* The chemo room still scares me a bit. Mostly because everyone looks SO sick. Even though I've experienced side effects quickly, physically I don't look sick yet. I know that I will eventually look sick and I hate seeing that so vividly everyday.
*Even in the midst of shakes and bad chills I can crack a joke. I love that through this whole thing I have not lost my sense of humor. I love that I can still laugh at this situation and at myself. Praise God for that.
*My husband is a treasure. He writes me a letter everyday and although it makes me cry EVERYDAY, I love that he is doing it. letterstojen.com
*The gym is a pipe dream right now. I'm too weak in the mornings to even try to get to the gym. 2 days this week I have tried to go for a run and have, but I was very weak.
*So will I have to do crossword puzzles someday? Cause all the old people in chemo land LOVE THEM.
*My poor little Alexis is having a hard time saying goodbye to me everyday. That makes me sad. I'm not gone very long, but that little angel loves her Mommy very much. She notices that I am not feeling 100% and tries to make me feel better.
*Vicodin has been the secret to helping me not feel like I have been hit by a truck. Those little miracle pills help with the chills, body aches, and keep the fever under the 102 which is what it wants to climb to.
*When you call the Dr about chest pains, he will MAKE you go to the ER (even if you don't want to) But no worries it was just a weird reaction I was having to the chemo and Vicodin will help with that too.
*No one but the nurses in Chemo land can work my chemo port. I have had 3 IV's put in my arm this week because other nurses can't figure it out. (That kind of cracks me up) I love my nurses!
*I'm pretty sure the old lady sitting next to me right now is dying and no one seems to care. It is another rude reminder that this is going to be a long year.
After week 1 I'm still praising God for his goodness. I don't deserve His love, grace, and mercy. But because I am His child He gives it to me freely.
4 comments:
I'm glad your first week of chemo is behind you!
Non-Chemo-Land nurses probably weren't trained how to deal with your chemo port. They went over Mediports with us in school for a few minutes and in 13 years of nursing I have seen exactly one. We have to maintain competencies for everything we do - if we rarely see Mediports, they don't bother to teach us how to deal with them!
Still, obviously it's a drag to have this perfectly good port and no one capable of using it. IV sticks hurt!
Here's to hoping your next weeks of chemo are uneventful.
Cindy got lectured from her nurse Zane that staying in bed means staying in bed, not having a shower. BPO (bathroom priviledges only LOL) So, the lesson in that is when your doctor/nurse tells you to do something, DO IT, even if it means not taking a shower and stinking to high heaven, or going to the ER when told. You're doing great honey -- one down, three to go. So glad your mom is there. Nothin like having mommy around huh?! Love you sweetie,
Nana
Jen, you don't know me, but I go to Stone and found your blog through Leslie's. Just wanted you to know I appreciate ALL your honesty and openness, and OF COURSE I will be praying for you.
(P.S. You won my heart in your "about me" section when you said you are a "horrible cook and suck at decorating." That makes two of us.)
-Leah Gibson
I remember being pregnant and coming into the doctors office and complaining about certain things: my back is hurting, I have a huge vein now popping out of my leg that wasn't there before:), my nose seems bigger:), My feet seem to have gotten larger, etc. etc. Each time I complained the answer was alway, "oh, that's normal." One day my husband joked and said, "you could walk in and say your nose fell off and they would say it's normal." :) I think of that because I hear in your writing about this new 'normal' that you are living. The 'club' that you are now a part of. What you are going through sucks, I can't think of any better word. Keep listening for those whispers from God, they are there...always.
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